never said "good bye"

as long as i could remember i had a mole (or a black freckle/beauty mark/whateva you wanna call em) on my left index finger. i was always quite fond of it. i would often gaze upon it and wonder how the heck did it decide to pop up there? i found it quite attractive.

i have one specific memory associated with that mole...i was living in Fairbanks, AK (i'm a army brat if ya didn't know) on the bus, either coming home from/or going to(?) school...Tanana Jr High....this guy, who i used to like...Kenneth Something...he was half black half asian somethin or other...anyway...he was on the bus with me & pointed out that mole on my finger. Touched my index finger & said he liked that mole...and told me that he had tons of moles like that too...and he did.

it was the first and only time anyone had ever pointed it out, and seen it like i always did.

i've got moles all over the place, but that one was one of my favorites...it freckled just below my nail, off to the side before my first joint on my finger. *sigh* i just noticed the other day when i was sick as a dog---which for the record, there's nothing worse than the involuntary gag reflex urge to throw up when there's nothing in your body to throw up, word to the wise...never eat sushi & mix saki bombs with beer, voKka & bombay sapphire---

anyway. i just noticed saturday that my mole was missing from my index.

i did notice that it had gotten a bit lighter in my later years...but it was still always visible...somewhere in the near past, it decided to retire from existence. now its only a faint memory.

*sigh*

i grew quite fond of that mole. i never got to say goodbye.

peace be, i am that mole-missing, g.